Dear Richard. We need to talk, really. It’s about that space thing of yours, Virgin Galactic. You know, when I was even younger than I am now, that is what I wanted to do. Become an astronaut, build a spaceship or two, and defend the earth against the baddies that could sneak past captain Kirk. But you know how it is, Richard, I had to change plans. Some doctor said you cannot save the planet if you are colorblind, so I did not build the spaceship either. There was not really a point, you see? So I am glad you did.
Richard, I was all excited when I saw Virgin Galactic would speak at LeWeb. I thought you would be there. But… you had better things to do, helicopter skiing with some supermodel, or having diner near Saturn with Kirk and Spock, I do understand that. Priorities and so.
So, you did send a nice video, on how you wanted to socialize space, and boldly send tourists where they never went before. Trust me Richard, I almost bought a ticket. You were good, on message, touching, wise, smart, a bit funny, and with that little twinkle in your eyes that made the ladies in the audience melt. You totally captured 3300 people by showing of some pricy spaceships, and some manly talk about opening up space to people like me. And then… you stopped. No more video. But you had a back-up Richard, you shipped George Whiteside, the CEO of Virgin Galactic to finish the presentation. He did, Richard, he did… he killed it.
Don’t ever do it again Richard, letting Whiteside do your presentation? Please? I’m sure he is smart, and nice, and good with numbers. And, he sees colors better than I do. But he is not an astronaut, he is not an adventurer, he is not a storyteller. He lost us Richard, all of us. Here is a man who calls your precious rockets and spaceships “vehicles”, and who murmured stuff that was utterly unexciting. The melted girls froze up again Richard! Men, who wanted to become firefighters and astronauts before coming to #LeWeb, left the auditorium to get some lukewarm coffee Richard. It was just pathetically boring. Vehicles… faut le faire as they say in France.
I feel guilty Richard, that I did not make those spaceships myself. I left you with the dirty work. Let me help you… I’m prepared to show George Whiteside how to present better, and how to say rocket in a sexy way. For free, of course Richard, just take me on one of those Intergalactic flights… so we can talk it over.